40 Rules for Being a BRIDESMAID

I have been a bridemaid 3 times (2 of which I was the maid of honor) in the span of 20 months. 2 continents, 2 countries and 3 cities. These are most important rules for taking on the responibility of being a bridesmaid from my humble extensive experience.

1. This is about the bride

2. Being a bridesmaid is expensive. You pay for a dress, shoes, hair, makeup, a bacheloroete party and sometimes a bridal shower. It is okay if you find that being a bridesmaid is out of your budget and in that case, let the bride know. There are so many other ways to help the bride.

3. If you have rational concerns about the style of the dress, let the bride know. Your friend the bride, truly cares about you being comfortable in the dress and will meet you in the middle

4. This is about the bride

5. Ask from time to time “what can I take off your plate to help”

6. Your phone and group chats are your best friends until the wedding is over

7. The bachelorette is all about spoiling the bride

8. The shower is all about showering the bride with love

9. This is not your wedding

10. This is about the bride

11. Befriend the bridal party. You do not need to become BFFs with them but do your best to get a long. You will be working together for a while

12. Show how excited you are for her and how happy you are for her.

13. Be her friend.

14. Go on coffee dates once or twice a week so she can vent about all the wedding planning

15. Be prepared to get out of your comfort zone….just a little bit (I had to wear my hair up and I hate wearing my hair up)

16. You have officially become the bride’s therapist. Be there for her again

17. This is not your wedding

18. This is all about the bride

19. Be prepared to wake up early to shop for chocolate on sale (7am y’all!) or stay up late to keep the bride company (if and when needed)

20. Bring the bride and groom coffee and food between the ceremony and the reception. They will be starving, and they won’t even know it.

21. Buy your shoes, dress and accessories by the deadline the bride provides. The last thing she needs to stress about is her bridesmaids.

22. Book your own hair and makeup. The bride doesn’t need to stress about her bridesmaids

23. Be a friend. Do not be burden on the bride.

24. This is about the bride

25. The bride asked you to be a bridesmaid because you two are close friends and she wants you to be there by her side on her wedding day. This is the bride’s day

26. Surprise Surprise. You will mostly likely be walking in with a groomsman

27. Be supportive. The last thing the bride needs is to have her bridesmaids bring her down

28. Pick your battles. You can negotiate some things with the bride. She is your friend. Make sure you are being reasonable. If you’re the only one struggling with that one point, reconsider your thoughts

29. Ask the bride how you can help

30. Be nice to the groom. If you’re on his bad side, you’re in big trouble.

31. This is not your wedding day

32. On the wedding day, make sure you’re on time for hair, make up, pictures. You do not need the MOH or the bride herself calling you wondering where you are.

33. Bring snacks or food the bride and grood for after the ceremony.

34. Bring them coffee for the photo session. The pictures will come out cute.

35. Bring flats to the reception. Trust me, you’ll need them.

36. Get your nails done professionally. You do need your nails smudging or peeling the day of the wedding

37. Keep your bouquet. It is a nice token from the special day. It also cost the bride fortune

38. This is about the bride

39. Have I mentioned this is about the bride?

40. Make sure to party all night!!